The undeniable power of faking it
Why do we fail to gauge our own abilities accurately, and when faking it can work
https://thedecisionlab.com/biases/dunning-kruger-effect
Sometimes, we find ourselves in a new job or role, or even as new parents and think, "Does anyone realize I have no idea what I'm doing?"
As a self-taught professional and new parent, I often experience this feeling. Imposter syndrome is universal, but it doesn't have to be paralyzing.
I won't claim I've figured it out; I doubt most people have. What I have figured out is how to ride the wave of self-doubt.
A solid foundation is critical for success in handling this uncertainty. This foundation isn't just about skills—it's about mental resilience and support systems that help move you forward when you are starting to 🐌.
Please remember that "faking it" and imposter syndrome are related but distinct. If left unaddressed, imposter syndrome can become a self-fulfilling prophecy. You might avoid pursuing opportunities and project a false image to others, inadvertently shaping their opinions of you. This can lead you to fall prey to a mindset that isn't grounded in reality. On the other hand, "faking it" means leaning into something even when you don't necessarily know everything yet.
While working at an ape-named e-commerce company, I was hired to be a Ruby on Rails developer. I had never coded in Ruby or been a full-time software engineer at that point. I had some JavaScript development and integration work as an app developer trying to get enterprise software to talk to warehouses. I also developed modifications for the video game in my youth. Yet, I had never worked on full-blown production software like this before. I was terrified.
So, when I moved from Vancouver, Canada (recently divorced—read: stressed and lost) to New York, I rented a short-term apartment, figuring I'd last at most 90 days. So I proceeded to “fake it” and madly took every online tutorial I could find, seized every chance to learn from my co-workers, devoured every book I could, and absorbed anything about Ruby or Rails that might be helpful.
I "faked it" until I wasn't anymore; I became a Ruby on Rails developer. I won't say I was remarkable at it. While there, I joined the data team to work on fancy stuff like machine learning and big data. I began the "fake it" cycle again a year or so later and never looked back.
I want to cover something I read recently on Refactoring → go read it and something I want to address as I think it’s relevant and worth repeating here.
The Dunning-Kruger (overconfidence effect) is often conflated with impostor syndrome. However, these are two very different phenomena.
Dunning-Kruger Effect
The Dunning-Kruger effect is a bias. It causes people with limited knowledge to overestimate their abilities in a specific area.
People with low ability in a particular area overestimate their competence.
It stems from a lack of self-awareness and metacognitive skills.
It can lead to poor decision-making, resistance to feedback, and overconfidence.
It's most common in people who are new to a skill or domain.
Imposter Syndrome
On the other hand, Imposter syndrome is characterized by persistent self-doubt and feelings of fraudulence despite evidence of competence and success.
High-achieving individuals underestimate their abilities and accomplishments.
People feel like they are "faking it" or don't deserve their success.
It can lead to anxiety, self-doubt, and reluctance to take on new challenges.
It's common among successful professionals and academics.
Key Differences
Self-perception: Dunning-Kruger leads to overestimation of abilities, while impostor syndrome causes underestimation.
Competence level: Dunning-Kruger typically affects those with lower competence, while impostor syndrome often plagues high achievers.
Self-awareness: Those experiencing Dunning-Kruger lack self-awareness, while those with impostor syndrome are often hyper-aware and self-critical.
Impact on performance: Dunning-Kruger may lead to taking on tasks beyond one's capabilities, while impostor syndrome can result in hesitation to embrace new challenges.
Response to feedback: People experiencing Dunning-Kruger tend to resist feedback, while those with impostor syndrome are usually receptive to criticism.
First recognize and acknowledge it
It's important to acknowledge these feelings, not suppress them. Acknowledging them helps with imposter syndrome and "faking it." It's common. I often feel like a fraud despite my successes. I attribute my success to luck, not my abilities. I hold myself to unattainable expectations, inducing a debilitating fear of defeat.
So challenge your inner critic who wants to crawl out and shame you. Write it down, tell someone, or say, "Hey brain, I know you're messing with me. I have better things to do, so fuck off." That's my favourite.
Seek support and mentorship
Stop, pause, and talk to someone. I prefer calling 📲 hearing another human voice is key part for me. Reaching out to friends or acquaintances out of the blue is a lifeline I rely on. Seeking an external perspective can be invaluable when we're too close to our challenges to find solutions.
Reach out to a mentor, colleague, or friend for a fresh take; text, slack group, or reach out however feels best to you ( I mentor on adplist.org and linkedin.com). Sharing your situation with someone sparks insight uncovers new solutions, and reinforces human connection, reminding yourself you're not alone.
Practice Self-Care
I've also found the following strategies to be the most effective in helping me thrive as a self-taught professional in hybrid and remote working environments these past years.
Therapy: Navigating divorce, a worldwide pandemic, inflation, and today's politics is no f*cking joke. Finding a trained professional has been one of the biggest unlocks for me. Also, just like with a good coach, don't be afraid to "quit" or try several therapists until you find one that works for you.
Direction: Goal setting shouldn't be complicated; it helps chart your course.
Support: A diverse group of friends offering varied perspectives—in tech and beyond, with different identities and orientations—to stretch your thinking and broaden your horizons.
Movement: I find exercise necessary; I try walking at least a few miles daily and going to the gym. We are designed to move, and when I worked in the office, I almost always had at least one walking meeting a day. Get outside - a short walk can do you wonders of breaking up your brain.
Time boxing and using your calendar: I time box all the time. When I did the altMBA many years ago, I frequently found that setting hard deadlines prevented me from avoiding delivery. Also, if you don't put a task on your calendar, have you really decided to do it? https://www.nirandfar.com/todo-vs-schedule-builder/
Celebrate Your Successes
We are all figuring it out as we go. I once told my therapist ”Don't add horsepower to your boat; remove resistance”. This idea isn’t new, and you can probably find something like it in the millions of self-help books and articles I’ve read over the years, but it is about being more focused on what you are actually trying to do and doing that.
To improve at something, you must reduce distractions. These include meetings, appointments, new projects, and Netflix binges. Often, we are too busy "learning" or just doing things for the sake of doing them. Streamline your priorities to emphasize what is significant.
I'm imperfect. As I write this, my iPhone is on "Do Not Disturb" mode across the room, yet it keeps somehow making its way back to my desk.
We're all pretending until we build the structure that turns that fake confidence into real expertise. The secret isn't in never faking it—it's in creating a solid foundation to support you. At the same time, you figure out the real deal, transforming your faking into fundamental skills and removing the feelings of others.
A few articles I’ve read recently inspired me around this subject.
Thinking your way out of imposter syndrome | Valerie Young